Swimsuits on Parade

It's that time of year again. Time to assess the damage that occurred all winter long and try on bathing suits. I know, I know, I already had a vacation this year, in which I LIVED in my bathing suit for approximately 4 days straight, but I just slapped on last year's model and went with the whole "I will never see any of these people again" theory. It worked pretty well with the exception of the 3 friends I went with, who I see all the time.

They are a pretty forgiving bunch though.

It became very clear this weekend that I needed to re-evaluate the choices I made last year on my suits when I was forced to really look at myself in the mirror a few hundred times at the health club while taking the kids swimming. In the locker rooms there are mirrors just about every direction you turn, and let me tell you, my choices last year, weren't so good.

Last year was a pivotal year for me in the swimsuit department though, so in my defense I had WAY to much to consider when making my choices. This year, I am a bit more experienced in the Tankini department and I feel as though I have a good solid idea as to what works for me and what doesn't. The sad part about this is: next year, I will have a whole new outlook on this situation, and will have to start all over again with a whole new set of rules, and I will be horrified (just like I am this year) that I prance around all summer in the suit I thought was perfect.

That is why this year, I am doing a fashion show, not for my kids, and not for my friends, but for the hubby. He will tell me straight-up if what I have on is working or is a joke.

The kids they just want to go swimming when I try on suits. So although they are brutley honest and comment on things that I don't even ask for comments on, they are way too easily distracted by the swimsuit and the idea that swimming season is coming soon (if not today in their brains) to really take the time that a complete analysis requires.

My girlfriends, man I love them, they take the time that a complete analysis takes, but then I am not too sure about the honesty piece. I can't say that I don't blame them. I mean, no one wants to tell their friends, "Wow, I didn't think your chest could look any flatter than it already is, and somehow your behind is wider!"

It's just a bit uncomfortable at lunch afterwards.

I feel like I have to take smaller bites and order a salad.

I think in the name of Responsible Friendship, it's better for your friends to see the finished product.

In the swimsuit department that is.

Goodness knows that they see anything but the finished product in all the other areas my life so this year, this is my gift to them.

So after spending an obscene amount of money on all the swimsuits that fit, tonight I will be doing a fashion show at home with the hubby who will do a complete analysis on all suits, and since he is already quite aware of what the unfinished product looks like, there is no explaining or hiding anything.

The rules have been stated beforehand that: 1. I will return some of these bathing suits no matter if all of them are so stinkin' cute I can't handle it (I am positive I don't even need this rule.). 2. Scott has to thoroughly look over each suit for any flaws that either the suit or I am displaying, and 3. He has permission to be BRUTALLY HONEST with me on my appearance in each suit with out it effecting our relationship.

With that said, I am now ready for the hardest part of spring. It will be difficult, long, and tedious, but in the end, I am hoping that this year I will have a suit that I can wear proudly for maybe more than just this summer.

Just wait until Scott finds out that he may have to do this again next year.

I won't tell him that right now...it'll ruin the night.