Coming to the End of an Era

It's bound to happen any day now. Although I act like it shouldn't come a day sooner, I have to admit, I am a bit sad about it. Paxton needs to give up the paci. He will be 2 1/2 in about 1 month, and to be honest with you, if you would have asked me 2 1/2 years ago if I would have a child that still took a paci after the age of 1 (let alone use a pacifier at ALL) , I would have laughed and said you were crazy for even thinking it. Alas, my son is still using his paci every nap and every night.

The problem is he LOVES his paci. I mean when you talk about it with him, he beams like a child in a candy store, over his paci. Problem number 2 is I LOVE my sleep. Paxton has always been a great sleeper...I am sure that will change. Lastly, Paxton is my last baby. When he gives up paci, it will officially be the last thing he has from his baby years. He will be a big boy, never to return to his baby-ness again. I don't know if I can handle that! Oh sure, I can hold onto the fact he is still in diapers, and is NO WHERE near potty training, but somehow that is not as sweet as the paci....

We've been talking a bunch lately about giving up the paci, reading books about giving up the paci, have introduced the paci fairy, who will magically come and take paci, and one night even tried to give it away (we failed miserably). Tonight, as I put him in bed and handed him is paci, I noticed that there were some spots on the paci were it may be wearing thin. I took the opportunity to go for it.

me: Paxi, do you see these spots?
Pax: Yes, whas wong with paci?
me: Paci is getting old, and might get a hole. We'll have to put him in the trash when that happens.
Pax: In the twash?
me: Yep, the trash...then you can be a big boy!
Pax: but I cry, momma
me: Yes, maybe, but you'll be ok
Pax: Me get a toy?
me: (laughing a bit because he already knows how to negotiate a toy out of this deal)Maybe? Maybe the Paci Fairy will bring you a toy for being a big boy!
Pax: Me get a Buzz Whiteyear (in his growly voice)
me: Yes, maybe a Buzz Lightyear.
Pax: Ok, Momma...(pops paci in and rolls over to go to sleep)

Part of me felt a small victory. Maybe, just maybe, this will be the approach to go. Make it look like paci broke and we had no choice...it had to go. Not our fault. In the end, paci let us down and had to go. The other half of me feels sad because when paci goes, so does the tie holding onto the last piece of baby-ness I, as a mom, will ever get to experience....until I change a poopy diaper that is...