I Would Call it Writer's Block, but...

I don't know if I really qualify as a writer.  Nope.  Pretty sure that someone who rambles in an unorganized fashion, sprinkles her ideas with commas and other random punctuation, is completely incompetent at spelling, and only "writes" about three or four times a month is most certainly not a "writer".   However, I will say I am suffering from a severe case of "Writers Block".  Life is most certainly happening all around me, I just am not sure how to put words to what I take in every day.

Good thing I am doing Scripture Memory this year.  That gets me here at least twice a month.

Even if I'm not punctual about it.

So here goes the first memory verse of April 2011.

(Can I just add, that with spring springing up all over the place, and with Easter coming up in a few short weeks, I can't help but think about the "newness" of everything.  New life.  Doesn't it sound amazing!  My prayer right now is that God would bring new life into our home this month.)

So, back with the memory verse. Since I am longing for newness, I think this is appropriate:

"Patient endurance it what you need now, so you will continue to do God's will. Then you will receive all that he has promised." -Hebrews 10:36 NLT 

Patient endurance. 

I can't help but relate this to running.  While I am no marathoner, I have run a few races in the last five years, and in the past year, I have been able to complete a couple of half marathons.  Running does not come easy for me.  In fact, I find myself nursing some sort of injury quite frequently.  Also, I am not fast.  Not even a little.  I'd like to think that I am made for distance and not for speed, however, the injury thing usually creeps in at some point and hampers those aspirations as well. 

It's hard to understand why I would even enjoy running at all.  There really should be no part of me that does.  However, I do.  It's hard, I physically shouldn't be able to do it at all, it takes a lot of effort, but, quite frankly, there is an immense satisfaction that comes from triumphing over it all and completing a distance I didn't think was even possible. 

Patient endurance.

This verse wasn't chosen because I am preparing for a race.  No, I chose it because I feel as though I have been in a race for the past four-ish months now.  I won't tell a lie and say that I am feeling like the finish line is around the corner, and I can just sprint it out.   Instead, I'm not sure where the finish line is.  There is a large temptation to stop running, and maybe walk.  Just a little bit.  Just so I can catch my breath.  Maybe take a swig or two off my water bottle. 

Something I've learned while training for longer distances: Once you go a certain distance, if you stop, you won't start back up again.  Even if you think you could pull out a few more miles if you just stopped, walked a little, took a little drink, you won't.  You will just walk.  Which actually isn't the end of the world if you are training.  If you are in a race, though, especially one that you paid for, it's not ideal.  There's something about walking across a finish line that doesn't sit well with me. 

Unless, of course, you signed up for a walk.  Then you're all good.

While I am not in an actual race, this time in my life feels like a race.  I didn't sign up for it, but I am not walking across the finish line. 

Trust me, the temptation is there.  I've thought about it a time or two, and even slowed my stride to an almost walk.  A "wog" if you will.

God has called me to this "race" to do His will.  While I have said that He is my God and I am His servant in the past many times, those words have never felt heavier than during this time.  I've had to actually live them out.  As a servant, I have been given this portion, and I will say "Yes, Lord."

Please don't think I think that any of this is easy.  It's not.  I also have often thought about those who God calls to run an even harder, longer race than he has given me.  There are so many, and the suffering is so great.  God's will for our lives is not always easy, but it is always for our good and the good of His kingdom, and He is there with us for every step.

As I have "raced" these past few months, God has been gracious in revealing so many wonderful things to me about Himself.  He has also made me more aware of His promises.  They are more than I can imagine, and far more than I deserve.  So, the last part of that verse is crucial.

Why would I not give into the temptations to walk, or quit altogether? "Then you will receive all that he has promised." 


That kind of reward, is better than any race medal I've ever received.